the 12 days of christmas blues
by sorryimahopelessromantic
Summary: just a little story i wrote about the horrible week poor ed's having. based on the song the 12 days of christmas.
1. chapter one

**1****2 days of Christmas blues  
**

ED: since it's Christmas and all. I've decided that I'm going to share a song that I made about my 12 days of horror.

Winry: Hey they weren't that bad!

Ed: I was shot in the head, got 11 stitches from a bar brawl, almost incinerated, 10 bashes on the head from a wrench on my head, and your telling me that, that isn't bad at all?

Al: well actually you brought some of that stuff on your own.

Ed: SHUT UP! (Starts singing)

On the first day of Christmas, Santa gave to me...

A wrench in my girlfriend's hand (Winry: yeah!!!)

On the second of Christmas Santa gave to me...

2 shots at the head from Havoc,

and a wrench in my gf's hand.

On the third day of Christmas Santa gave to me...

3 bursts of flames from pissing the colonel off,

2 shots to the head and

a wrench in my gf's hand.

Al: why do you keep blaming Santa for your misfortunes? YOU"RE the one bringing them on yourself!

Ed: because..um we kinda got into a little fight...and...

Al: OMG! Please tell me that you didn't! Please!

Ed: he only got minor injuries...

Al: OMG! NII-SAN!!!)

On the fourth day of Christmas manta gave to me...

4 stacks of work for Christmas

3 bursts of flames

2 shots to the head and

a wrench in my gf's hand.

On the 5th day of Christmas Santa gave to me....

5 puppy hayates from Fuery,

4 stacks of work,

3 burst of flames,

2 shots to the head, and

a wrench in my gf's hand.

On the 6th day of Christmas Santa gave to me...

6 flying swords from king Bradley,

5 puppies hayates,

4 stacks of work,

3 bursts of flames,

2 shots to the head

and a wrench in my gf's hand.

On the 7th day of Christmas Santa gave to me....

7 insults from Al (Al: actually more than 7 nii-san.),

6 flying swords,

5 puppies hayates,

4 stacks of work,

3 bursts of flames,

2 shots to the head

and a wrench in my gf's hand.

On the 8th day of Christmas Santa gave to me....

8 complaining neighbors,

7 insults from Al

6 flying swords

5 puppies hayates

4 stacks of work

3 bursts of flames

2 shots to the head and

a wrench in my gf's hand.

On the 9th day of Christmas Santa gave to me....

9 cartons of milk Al bought me to help me grow

Ed: what the hell!

Al: it's the thought that counts nii-san

Roy: but ed if you want to grow you need to drink more mi-

Ed:one more word and I swear

Roy (smirk): what? Two start to bicker. Al sighs and continues the rest for his brother.)

8 complaining neighbors (Al: (mutters) im surprised that that the police weren't reported on us.)

7 insults from Al

6 flying swords

5 puppies hayates

4 stacks of work,

3 bursts of flames

2 shots to the head

and a wrench in my gf's hand.

On the 10th day of Christmas santa gave to me...

10 smacks on the head for busting my automail,

9 cartons of milk

ed: argh!

8 complaining neighbors

7 insults from Al (well you were annoying me!)

6 flying swords

5 puppy hayates

4 stacks of work

Hawkeye: I could've given you more

Ed: point taken

3 burst of flames

Roy: hey it could've been worse

Ed: like the last time when you tried to set my hair on fire!?

Roy: hey it was an accident (widens eyes innocently, all the while trying not to smirk)

Ed: liar!

2 shots to the head,

and a wrench in my girlfriends hand

On the 11th day of Christmas Santa gave to me....

Ed: oh jeez karma hates me!

Winry: no we love you, you just tend to get on peoples nerves sometimes...oh who am I kidding? Like 90% of the time.

Ed: thanks! (Sarcastic) I love you too!

Winry: (smiles) no prob!

11 stitches on the head from a bar brawl...

Al: do I even want to know?

Ed: Havoc took me!

Havoc: he promised to behave!

Al: and you honestly believed him? This is my brother we're talking about?

Havoc:...

10 smacks on the head for bashing my automail

9 cartons of milk to help me grow

8 complaining houses

7 insults from Al

6 flying swords

5 puppy hayates

Al: oh so we can keep dogs, but when it comes to kitties you're totally against it!

Ed: oh for...

4 stacks of work

3 bursts of flames

Roy: hmmmm...

Ed: don't even think about it colonel bastard!!!

2 shots to the head and,

a wrench in my gf's hand

On the 12th day of Christmas santa gave to me...

a surprise part thrown by my friends for me!!!

Winry: we felt bad about how your weeks been going, so we threw a party to cheer you up.

Ed: (sniffles) thanks guys

Winry: omg! Are you crying?!

Ed: no.....

Winry: omg! That is sooo cute!!! (throws arms around him)

Roy: did you hear that fullmetal? That was cute. Especially the part where your nose goes all red and -

Ed: I'm warning you colonel bastard! f**k off!

Al: I told you he'd lose it.

Ed: that goes for you to Al!!

11 stitches from a bar brawl...

Al: no more bars for you nii-san!

Ed: you can't tell me what to do! I'm 17 for crying out loud!

Al: funny I forgot, must be because you don't act like it...

Roy: or look like it...

(Ed just grits teeth and ignores them )

10 smacks to the head for my busted automail

9 cartons of milk

8 complaining houses (Al: they should try living with him...)

7 insults from Al

6 flying swords

5 puppy hayates

4 stacks of work

3 bursts of flames

2 shots to the head

and a wrench in my gf's hand

Winry: don't worry I'm not going to use it...unless you provoke me into doing so then yea

Ed: thanks! I love you too!!!

Winry just laughs

The end

a/n note: phew finally done!!!:p took me along time to finish but that was just cuz I was supposed to be doing my homework....but I'm not....shhh noone tell my mom...but anyways R&R!!! =D


	2. Epilogue: i warned you

Epilogue : I warned you...

"So fullmetal, nice song you sang there" said Roy giving edward a sly glance.

Wtf does he want now? "ok, what do you want?" snapped edward shooting roy a look of irritation.

Roy gave him a mock upset look "what? Can't a friend give you a compliment?"

"I'm sorry, I never was under the impression that we were friends, you have a funny way of showing it."

Roy pretended he hadn't just been burned and by none other than a kid twice younger than he was. " I especially love the way the part where in the end you tear up, you looks so cute and vulnerable, you should cry more often."

"SHUT UP! I do not look cute!and I -wait did you just call me cute?"

roy smirked. "don't get ahead of yourself now, I perfer people that act they're age if you know what I mean."

"you implying that I don't act my age!"

Roy crossed his arms and grinned. "oh I think you know the anwser to that."

al clossed his eyes and rubbed his temples. And in 5-4-3-2...

and just as Al expected ed exploded. What he hadn't anticipated was, his brother leaping on top of the colonel in the process.

"Big brother what are you doing!" al yelled.

Ed stopped in mid punch. "what does it look like?"

al shook his head. "nevermind." winry is SO gonna kill him.

Just then winry came into the office with roy's girlfriend riza. "so I was thinking that we-" but winry stopped in mid sentence when she saw the scene before her.

Ed's eyes widened when he saw the look on her face. "winry I can explain! It's not what it looks like! I repeat it's NOT what it looks like!"

"r-r-riza.." stammered roy when he saw riza's hand starting to twitch toward her hand gun.

Too bad listeneing was the last thing the two wanted to do.

"hey al?" said winry in a sweet voice.

"yes?" he said warily.

"can you step outside for a minute. Me and Riza would like to talk to our _boyfriends"_

_oh shit!_ Im_ so _screwed. Thought roy.

Al shrugged depite the pleas that he was getting. "yea ok, just don't kill them."

winry smirked evilly. "don't worry we won't kill them..."

Sighing at the threat Al left the room despite the desperate pleas of the poor and terrified colonel and his older brother .Why couldn't his brother just stay out of trouble?


End file.
